At the beginning of a relationship, everything feels different. You feel like you need to spend every minute of every day with this person. You meet them, then go home and call them the next minute. You could be in an important work meeting or a college lecture and text your partner all the way. You can’t get enough of him/her and not being with them makes you sad.
Then, time goes on.
As days go by, the texting and calling decreases. The frequency of your intimate dates reduces and you don’t find yourself thinking about the person during meetings. And with time, things may get even more different. This is nothing to be worried about, this is completely normal. As long as you and your partner still love each other, this is just a sign that your relationship has evolved and moved on to the next stage.
Experiencing anxiety in a relationship is not uncommon. Very often, when we don’t receive replies or when our partner is away for a long time, then we get anxious and start questioning the relationship itself. Sometimes it gets worse and leads to a single person experiencing extreme anxiousness.
Anxiety is non-constructive and can negatively affect both your personal life and relationship. It is extremely important to work on ways to deal with your anxiety and lessen the effects.
1. Figure out the root cause
Are you feeling this way because something in the past has broken your trust or is it just all in your head? Do you really have a reason to be anxious? Sometimes, our gut instinct is right and in other cases, we freak out about things when there’s really no reason to. In order to overcome your anxiety, you need to analyze why you’re feeling this way, what has caused this and try to understand if the reason is real.
Exercise has proven to be one of the best techniques for anxiety reduction. Exercising helps to clear the mind from negative and unwanted thoughts and it is extremely easy to incorporate this into your lifestyle.
3. Deal With Your Insecurities Yourself
We often feel insecure about a lot of things and tend to seek reassurance from our partners. While this is natural, it is also important to understand that these feelings originate from us and no matter what they say, it is going to come back eventually. Asking your partner to console you every time you feel anxious is never a permanent solution. It is just a temporary fix and you might start feeling anxious again for the same reason after a few days or weeks.
4. Don’t Act On It
Nobody likes a person who constantly keeps asking, “Do you still love me?” or “Why haven’t you been spending time with me?” Acting on your feelings may lead to fights and feelings of unrest between you and your partner. If you really trust them, then there is no need to keep questioning their love for you and their intentions. It is extremely important to understand the difference between anxiety arising out of actual fear and anxiety for no reason.
5. Talk To Your Partner
If you feel anxious constantly about a particular thing, it is always better to share your feelings with your companion. This can help sort out issues in the relationship. Your partner could tell you about their feelings and this can help you understand things better.
6. Make A Fresh Start
If your trust has been broken and your anxiety is driven by real experiences in the past, then you need to figure out your next course of action. It is not wise to continue to live in anxiety. If you are set on making your relationship work, then talk to your partner about cleaning the slate and making a fresh new start. Treat your relationship as if it’s new and erase all past mistakes. Though this is easier said than done, it will be helpful to overcome your anxiety.
Overcoming anxiety is a decision that has to come from within. In a relationship, we are vulnerable and can get hurt any time, but worrying about that is only going to spoil today’s good moments. Don’t you think?